whatever

i miss my grandma.

so yesterday i drove out to my hair salon which is several towns away in a reeeally small town.
i am almost always late because it is so many towns away.
i spend most of my drive there worrying that i am late and then usually i am right on time.

occasionally i show up on the wrong day... but that is the not the point of this post.

(i just googled the population of this town... 872! oh my goodness)

so after my hair was colored and cut so nicely i paid and went to my car.

and then i looked to my left and saw poppies!

this man planted all of these.
he was watering with his red tractor... couldn't be any more perfect?!

it was absolutely gorgeous.
it was so sad to me that i did not have my big camera.
i am going to HAVE to go back with it...soon

my grandma loved flowers.
i mean... she LOVED them.

she gave me poppy seeds many times and told me to just sprinkle them in my flower beds & they would come up.
it never worked for me.
she had the magic touch.
as i walked around that little patch of poppies i kept hearing her voice.
she would have been beaming.  
she would have noticed all kinds of details that i missed.
it would have made her day.

i miss her.

 

 

 

class of 2013

well... she graduated.
we are VERY proud of her.
the ceremony was outdoors and the sky was so dark... even lightening in the distance.
it was nice to not be SO HOT but the weather was very iffy and made me nervous.
as soon as it ended the entire stadium emptied almost immediately.
it was raining shortly after. 

so we did not get photos of her afterward with friends or with her tassel,etc.
but we got this one really quick before the ceremony.
she got a new dress and looked so pretty! 

 

our party almost didn't happen because of the weather.
there was even a tornado 30 minutes away!
i said "well... it's not a TRUE Kansas party without a tornado watch"

she requested rainbow cake.
i hadn't made one in a few years.... remember when i first made it?
way back before they were EVERYWHERE.
BEFORE martha stewart.
granted martha's was very professional looking and perfect.
but mine is filled with a mama's love.
:)
perfection is not the goal. 

it was so fun to make it again.

we kept the snacks and drink very simple.
and credit to my boys... they helped me big time preparing the food.
they rocked yesterday!
it was "Duerksen Team Effort" for sure all week long.
that was a huge blessing we kept it simple since it POURED hard rain just before the party.
anything elaborate we would have done would've been ruined.






every party should have a baby.
it should be a rule.
so many of craig's family came by to wish lauren good luck in college and give her hugs.
one great thing about big milestones like graduations or weddings is seeing the family you don't see as often.

lauren with my mom and lauren with craig's mom.

it was so fun to have my friends show up to love on me as well as lauren. 
high school graduation is big deal for the kids but also a BIG DEAL for the parents too!
and they snuck off and were cleaning up in my kitchen and doing dishes when i wasn't looking.
grown up friends are the best! 

although... i prefer babies at parties that are not wearing K-State onesies.
he is so cute that i made an exception.
i was so busy that i never even got to hold this guy! lauren took over as baby holder for this party. 

 

 

family friends that we have had since i was 8 years old came to celebrate. 
(my dad did not get the memo about the black shirt...)

i LOVE that they came.
that is love ya know?  showing up for your people.   taking the time.  it is meaningful. 
it makes me teary.  

craig was face timing with his sister during the party.
:)
isn't that fun?  she got a little tour of the party and said hello.  
2013 is pretty awesome. 

i took an after photo this morning since it was too crazy yesterday.
our new little patio that we put in and all the pots of flowers make this place even happier.
it's so peaceful out there.
my chippy painted metal benches got new cushions. (home depot online)
i used all old pots, buckets and planters i already had to plant flowers inside.
the bunting is the same as what i sell in my shop...not weather proof but who cares.
it holds up just fine.

great party.

i think lauren felt loved.
and that was the most important part of yesterday for me.

 

and now i am going to go sit on that yellow bench.
:)

 

my sweet grandma.

yesterday i spent the day with my family remembering my grandmother.

she passed away on january 1st.

her service was lovely...the scripture, the songs, the memories that were shared... i loved it.

my parents and sister made a slide show of photos of her life that was so fun to see.

she had 17 grandchildren and 21 great grandchildren.



she was always kind & cheerful.   she was quiet and reserved.  

she always looked put together... make-up on, hair done, jewelry and pretty clothes... always.

even her jammies were fancy.

her skin was so soft.

she always sent me birthday cards that had were girly and had glitter on them.
she never forgot.

 
we will forever joke about her saying "it's a new recipe...i don't know if it's any good"
she baked a lot.

her laugh was a snort so we loved to get her laughing as much as possible.

 

almost all of the family was there to celebrate her life.
i loved seeing my cousins again.
it's kind of a strange thing to be the grown ups now.
we spent all those christmases together as kids and now we are the ages our parents were then!
i love them all so much.
funerals and weddings remind of us those who made us who we are...the beginnings.
family ties run deep.
i didn't want the day to end and have to say goodbye to them again. 

annie made a little shrine of her own when we came home.
she placed her flowers from the service in a jar & scotch taped grandma's picture to it for her bedside table.
we tried to talk very openly about the service, the casket, the family, the tears.
who knows what they will remember from that day but i think it will be posititve. 

i loved my grandma.
i will miss her always being with our family.
she was there...sitting on the couch while the kids ran all around her.
sitting at the dining room table while meals were prepared around her.
i will miss her there with coffee in the mornings at my moms.
she didn't say much ("well meg...what's new with you?")
we were often afraid that waffle would knock her down.

i knew that she loved me.
and that i was important to her.
that means the world to me.
she made sure we were okay, taken care of, thought of and worried about.  

she was kind and loving and proud of all of my cousins and me.

i am so grateful to have had her in my life this long.